Creative

or not.....This post might not be my most creative ever. I want to get some pictures up because I obviously haven't posted any in awhile, but after starting the day with a rather hellish doctors appointment for Baby Mouse, the creative juices just aren't flowing so quickly. I basically have no idea how much my 15-month-old Baby Mouse weighs or how tall she actually is nor do I know what percentiles the "estimated" figures fall into; both our nurse and doctor were fairly irritated that Baby Mouse was frightened during the whole ordeal. I guess she wasn't supposed to be. The weight that is written in her chart is 19 pounds, 6 ounces, and the height written in is 29 inches which may be accurate, but I have a hankering for Grandma to do a more thorough weight and height assessment one of these days....

Unfortunately, after thinking about the situation at the clinic this morning, I've realized the shiveringly cold atmosphere at Baby Mouse's appointment today is likely my fault. After the horrendous atmosphere at our walk-in clinic visit in March (the one where I was told I was akin to a milk cow....), I wrote a somewhat nasty letter suggesting that the nurse practitioner we saw should perhaps receive more education on breastfeeding and the value of positive relating to patients. Mr. T agrees that the cold shoulders I got consistently today were probably the result of that letter being shared (or someone asking for input about my complaint, etc.). I'm sad that that could be the case because my complaints had nothing whatsoever to do with our primary physician, but, unless there was some sort of negative event that set a bad tone at the clinic for the morning today, I'm afraid I may have to take responsibility for being such a verbose patient. Sooo.....lesson to self: no more assertive behavior. It's not worth destroying relationships that have worked well for six years. It's not like my letter probably had any effect on the educational level of the staff of the childrens' walk-in clinic on current breastfeeding best practices anyway.

Ah. In spite of today's misfortune, we continue to have a blast around here. These pictures should catch you up on some of what we've been involved in lately!

How did she go from baby swing to big girl swing with such frightening speed? The past two years were supposed to feel like, well, just that - two years....not two minutes! We have such fun at the park.

Lots of fun at home, as well.

Our May Day butterflies. Butterfly starts with "B".

Baby Mouse loves to sniff. This is her "sniffing face".

Baby Mouse also likes to help compost. She is ripping a paper bag in this photo. Miss Mouse was helping me get bread in the bread machine, but she was so proud of the bread machine bowl that she held it consistently in front of her face for the pictures. I didn't think anyone really was interested in my bread machine bowl, so I didn't post those pictures.

This is Baby Mouse's "thinking face". She furrows her eyebrows and looks very serious.

Finger painting outside. Budding artists' and Mommy's dream combination!

Baby Mouse tried to be a finger paint thief. She was caught red-handed. Hardy, har, har.

Hubert likes to drink from the girls' table. They love it, too!

He looks like he's supervising, but he's actually waiting patiently to see if he can grab some chalk for a treat when I'm not looking.

A random picture of my foot for anyone who was wondering what a foot looks like when it has run 13.1 miles in socks that were soaked at mile 1. Miss Mouse declared it looked like a "puh-ruuuuunnne!" Thank you so much to Grandma and Grandpa T. who cared for the girls so that Mr. T and I could run!! Oh, and sorry to anyone who is reading this after eating....this foot picture should maybe have come with a warning label or something.

I thought Baby Mouse would be fascinated by the animals at the zoo. Turned out she was more interested in the herbaceous life than anything.

Miss Mouse could have studied the animals all day. We had learned about camels - Camel starts with "C"; some camels have one hump while some have two; they have extra fat for energy in their humps; they are used for their hair and meat, and as an important means of transportation in deserts which are like super-huge sandboxes, etc., etc. So, in the afternoon, we headed out to the zoo to see some real camels! She was more impressed with the ducks and birds, but I'm glad she did get to see a real live camel, too.

Baby Mouse not really sure why she's supposed to be on the other side of the side walk looking at semi-hidden animals when she could be exploring the soil.

Miss Mouse thought the goats had teeny-tiny ears and were "beautiful".

Today Miss Mouse collected what she decided were "seeds". I thought it was a cool picture. She had asked me to photograph them.

She and Daddy had a picnic lunch outside after going shopping this morning. I think Baby Mouse got the raw end of the deal by far.

Our first pool day of the summer.

She was braver than Baby Mouse and I. For the most part, we only waded while Miss Mouse went in full-body.

I thought this screamed "summer! freedom!"

Baby Mouse and Hubert treed a squirrel. Again.

I took this picture because it reminded me of how cool it is to look up at tree branches. One of many things I think we forget after childhood. Thank you, Baby Mouse and Miss Mouse, for reminding me of such things.

Our garden. There are currently five sprouts, not counting the marigolds. If we get some lightning tonight, maybe we'll have more in the morning!

Happiness Is....

Another one of these posts....I just can't keep these things to myself. They're too beautiful!

*A heavy perfume of lilac in the backyard, odd in an off-year for the bushes, with the faint combined scent of pansies and a fern peony in the front yard. It is a truly calming and gorgeous way to end the day by stepping out on the front step to whiff pansies, fern peony, and perhaps a hint of crab apple tree from down the block. I'd prefer to be able to see the sunset, but I'll take these scents and be quite content, too.

*Finding that Baby Mouse loves listening to lullabies and swaying in my arms to fall asleep. It's been a long, long, long time coming to find myself some way to comfort this babe. I don't think it is possible that the sweetness of Baby Mouse falling asleep on my chest as we dance can diminish.

*Miss Mouse running "eight miles" and prancing about like a proud little hen all day. Eight miles for her last Saturday was around the block with Daddy pushing Baby Mouse in the stroller while I did indeed run eight miles. She was so excited to have run eight miles, "just like Mommy".

*Miss Mouse cheering for Baby Mouse as she [slowly] increases her milk intake. "Way to go! Gimme five!". Baby Mouse then does run right over and give her sister "five" and then sometimes also claps for herself. There's something incredibly fun about watching two little girls who neither one quite "get it" yet interacting as though they do.

I love our life.

Compassion

A few weeks ago we got really great tax news. We have not experienced great tax news to this point in our marriage. In 2006 we had decided to blow a lot of money going somewhere in Canada; we had planned to have a 1-year old at that point but didn't, so we figured we might as well act like young people again....I even had a lighthouse hotel picked out for us on the East Coast. Then we got our tax news. We paid the government instead of the lighthouse hotel. I have no aversion to paying taxes, and I see immense value in what our money does.....but tax day has been a yearly tough day for us.

Not so this year! We got great news that we had paid too much, so not only do we get a refund but our quarterly taxes go down, as well! What to do with the extra unexpected money?

What to do?

What to do?

What to do?

Book the foregone trip to Canada? Probably not at this point. We decided our first order of business was to jump into something we'd been feeling more and more strongly called towards lately. We're excited to announce that we are the proud sponsors of two adorable little boys through Compassion International! These little guys live in Tanzania and are actually in the same village. Mr. T coordinated that purposely so that in case we (or he, more likely) ever has a chance to visit them, we (or he) could see them both in the same trip. We are so incredibly excited about this; Miss Mouse has asked to go "visit the boys' homes" and has asked to draw them pictures. Being able to help out these little boys is such an exciting privilege. It amazes me, really.

In our last session of GriefShare tonight, our video talked about "miracle moments", times when God seems to intervene directly in our lives to encourage us. I would count the experience of my last post about butterflies as one of those moments, but I would also count the way God chose these little boys for us. Mr. T called me to see how he should choose which children to sponsor. There is a woman in our church who organizes a "Compassion Sunday" every year, so there are tons of kids to choose from. I certainly didn't want anything to do with picking children; we'd have signed up for them all and been broke ourselves! My hope was to get the kids that were left after everyone else picked, but with the way things worked, that wasn't going to happen. Sooo....I told Mr. T to just pick however he wanted - two girls in honor of our two living Mice, two boys since we have the two girls at our house - whatever. I offered a short prayer (I don't often talk about doing so, but I do quite often) that he would be led to some children that we would be able to really connect to and help in more ways than just financially.

Well, he came home that night with our two packets. The youngest boy is absolutely so cute you could "eat him up", and he enjoys singing! How sweet! What a cutie. The older boy (they're from different families, just the same project area) looks very serious and is very tall and thin. The youngest was born Jan. 14, 2006; nice, I thought. He turned four now. Then I happened to glance at the oldest boy's birthday: June 6, 2005. I turned sharply and asked Mr. T if he had done the choosing on purpose. He gave me a blank look and explained that he had chosen them from the same project and in a country that was on the safer side to visit. I got tears in my eyes as I pointed out the date; all I had thought was that it was incredibly close to Hope's June 2nd birthday.....Mr. T was the one who pointed out that June 6, 2005 was the day we buried her.

So, somewhere across the world, going on five years ago, as I was burying my baby, wondering what I was going to do, how I was going to survive, there was another mother welcoming her own baby into the world, likely wondering some of the same things. I feel connected to her in a way, though it could be that I'm just romanticizing things. The child I knew in 2005 doesn't need me anymore; she has more care and love in Heaven than we could ever have provided for her here; but this little boy, maybe he does need us. In a small way, perhaps what I can offer that little guy now will help his mommy and I both answer some of those questions from June 6, 2005. We can't wait to get started connecting to these little guys whom God chose for us.

B-Bye, Butterfly....I'll See You Later

We visited some friends in Enderlin today. It was a fun visit, as always. Afterwards, we headed to the cemetery. This is customary for us in the non-snow months of the year. Last fall I had found little bouquets of flowers on sale for $1 somewhere, probably Walmart, and let Miss Mouse pick one for Baby Hope's grave. She picked out a pink bouquet, and today we finally got to go put it at the cemetery. Miss Mouse was adamant that she should be the one to do it. To my surprise as we walked to the plot, I noticed that the pinwheel we had put on in 2006 was there spinning; the pink, glow-in-the-dark butterfly that we put out in 2009 was there spinning; and, true to what seems to be the tradition, someone else beat me again this year and put out a pretty pink bouquet with a crucifix on it. I don't think there's any way the ornaments from 2006 and 2009 could have made it through that many winters; I really think someone must take them off in the fall and put them out again in the spring. I probably write this every year, but it is so incredibly meaningful that someone does that and that someone (else?) puts out a pretty bouquet every year. Miss Mouse is especially fond of the butterfly we got last year.

As we drove away, Miss Mouse waved and said "B-bye, butterfly. I'll see you later." So true, Miss Mouse, on so many levels. Perhaps someday her own words will help her understand where her older sister is and why she was named for 1 Peter where we are told that in Christ we have a living hope. She certainly spoke comfort, hope, grace, and trust to me today in her situational innocence. B-bye, butterfly....we'll see you later, indeed.

What We've Been Doing

What a fun Monday! Miss Mouse and I got to ride the ferris wheel, and then Mr. T got me a new bike! The brakes work; the gears work; it's amazing! I do have to say I am still pretty attached to my "old" bike that I got when I was 13....it's staying right where it is in the garage. But this new one is pretty spiffy!! I even got to ride it home - with a helmet! I've never had a helmet in my life. I figured it was about time.

Miss Mouse had her turn and then decided Baby Mouse needed one, too. She pushed her in circles for about 10 minutes. We have video.

Anyone need a darling clip for a darling girl? They come in flowers and stars in a variety of colors. (Shameless plug).

Baby Mouse's signature "nose crinkle" in her Easter bonnet.

My Easter bunnies.

Fancy Nancy party attire. There were approximately 65 other girls in similar attire at this party. Oh, the feathers and glitter!

Aren't these cute? I was so proud. Miss Mouse and I worked and worked on these special Easter muffins. We dyed the eggs; then we mixed up the muffin batter; then we carefully placed each raw, dyed egg into the batter; into the oven they went to cook the eggs and the muffins. Great idea, right?

Not so much. I had raw eggs and a heart-broken Miss Mouse the Saturday before Easter. To add insult to injury, the "Mr. Food method" of hard boiling eggs didn't work, either, so when I tried to console Miss Mouse with a regular hard-boiled egg, it cracked and oozed, too. I was not having my most Betty Crocker moment.

Greatest Show on Earth, Take Three

To Grandma Kathy's chagrin, the girl on the chair is eleven years old. The circus is a family enterprise, though, and, really, if you didn't start doing that at eleven, who in their right mind would be brave enough when they were older??!

They had a sort of cool, retro-type atmosphere for this act.

Everybody loves the elephants! Miss Mouse was pleased they did a sleeping pose "just like on Mr. Rogers'!!" We've been watching Mr. Rogers' episode called "Day at the Circus" over and over and over and over......

In addition to the elephants, there were tigers and pigs. Yep, pigs. They were really funny. The clown wasn't so funny for our sensitive Miss Mouse; he just kept pretending certain areas of his body were injured, and I kept reassuring her he was pretending to try to be funny. She had a less-than-amused look on her face the whole time. The tight-rope-walker who walked right over our heads was cool, too, although Grandma pointed out that he could save himself by hanging onto the rope if he tipped, but he'd have to drop the 65-pound metal bar onto us. Ugh. Thankfully, he was good at his job!

Overall, it was a super fun circus. Grandma bought us 'reserved' section seats, so we were way, way closer than last year up in the nosebleed section (when I bought the tickets!). I'm quite opposed to the commercialism piece of the circus, where the announcer tells the kids "you'll all be winners if you have your special light-saber toy, so get your parents to go buy you one now during intermission", but Miss Mouse did get a hat with her name on it and a picture of her and Grandma with the singing pig. Who could oppose those types of cuteness?! Baby Mouse received her own name hat when we got home, too. Even though Miss Mouse had attended her first circus when she was Baby Mouse's age, it was such a different setup from the larger area here. When Miss Mouse was tiny, we were right down in the midst of the action, so her attention was captured the whole time. I'm really glad Baby Mouse stayed home with Grandpa Dick and Daddy this year, though I'm betting she'll have fun next year!

To One Mr. Wylie Coyote,

At the composition of this letter, I hope you are well on your way to a wilderness far from our neighborhood. I sympathize with your plight; I really do because you were likely displaced by flood waters. However, I will have no hesitation in ordering, yes, ordering, my loving husband to defend our life and limb and that of our sweet pup, Hubert, if we see you in our very own yard. Yes, Wylie, it is imperative for your safety that you stay out of our yard.

It severely displeases me that the situation with you was handled so poorly yesterday. I hope not so much for your destruction as for the safety and security of my own two, darling, little Mice. You see, your presence in our neighbors' yard shatters the serenity of my own sleepy, shady little backyard complete with its six-foot fence. Your presence there, regardless of whether you were displaced by flood waters, means that you, and others of your kind, potentially may run through my neighborhood again. The next time, perhaps, the girls and I won't have terrible colds and be stuck inside. Perhaps we would be out planting flowers in the front yard, blowing bubbles, or chasing butterflies. Should we not be able to engage in these activities freely, with a sense of confidence in our own well-being? Should I not be able to have my children in our very own yard for fear of their safety? Your intentions are known solely to you; knowing others of your kind, I dare to doubt your honor a bit.

It is fair to say I am enraged not so much by your presence as by the directive of the city to our neighbor. Our neighbor, the best in the world, by the way, called the police for assistance in your, er, removal only to be brushed off and transferred to the Humane Society of our city for assistance. While I respect their work in many areas, their directive to him to "open your yard gates and let him go" with regard to your removal astonishes me in its irresponsibility and disrespect for the safety of the children of this neighborhood. As I stated before, I assure you that I hold you no ill will and wish not for your death, though I would not have mourned you long; I find it physically sickening to think that our city believes it holds no responsibility to at least tranquilize and relocate you, that, instead, our city apparently believes that a large (large) coyote running wild through blocks populated with small children out playing in their yards poses no threat. Perhaps it poses no threat to you, Mr. Coyote, but I happen to believe you pose a significant danger to my 29- and 19-pound Mice. I am not one to think that children should be left in the front yard to play alone, but it is difficult for me to believe that in the near future, when my Mice would be, say, 2 and 4 years old, they cannot even play safely in their backyard. Alas, this is what your presence has taught me. This and the fact that our city has become too large when the rights of you, Mr. Coyote, trump the rights of my little Mice.

Do not return, Wylie. Your life depends on that.

My sincere regards.