Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Joy to the World


One evening last week, Miss Mouse sat down at the piano, looked at me, and said "Look, Mom. What song is this?" She said it with a grin that told me she knew what song she was going to play. She then proceeded to plunk out the first line of "Joy to the World".

Now, I realize the first line of "Joy to the World" is a simple scale, but she still had to put the notes together, figure out where to start, and know in her head that she was going to use those keys to make that sound. I was excited, to say the least. My sister started playing songs like that on an old violin when she was around the same age, and talent like she has doesn't come around every day. It both frightened and excited me to see my little Miss Mouse showing the first signs of something similar!

Monday, December 20, 2010

Scripture & A Snapshot


I ran across this passage in a devotional book the other night. Several of my college professors had the same pet peeve: the word "impacted". So, lest I slip and actually say that this passage had a serious "impact" on me, leading you to believe that some sort of anvil fell on my head and impacted my skull, or that I had some other sort of personal, bodily problem, I will find a better way to say that this passage was a powerful one for me.

On Whom are we building our house? On the trappings of this world, the American Dream, the "Keeping up with the Jones's" mentality?

Miss Mouse had her last official day of ice skating for this session on Saturday. She completed the "testing" and passed Pre-Level 1 with flying colors. As I stood with her on the ice, my heart pounding as if I were the one being tested, my head filled with anxiety about whether she had performed well enough or not, this passage came back to me. And it did feel sort of like an anvil being thrown into my stomach, yanking my attention away from my own competitive spirit, toward the beautiful, fresh little girl standing next to me who understands nothing about 'testing' or being 'good enough' or 'not good enough', who doesn't need to understand those things right now, who just needs to know she is loved and was created by the Most High, the Rock, to be His child. And that is on what we strive to build our house. Thanks be to God that He reminds me of that......again.......and again.........and again.....and again.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Perfect Imperfection

It's possible I've used that title before. Perfecting imperfection seems to be something I'm getting quite good at....and in many ways, I'm actually proud of that. It takes just one look in one pair of eyes staring up at me, and that yanks me out of my "task focus" and drives me headlong into the "process focus" that drives my hubby so insane. Truth be told? I think he's beginning to enjoy the process, too. It's just that to enjoy the process, one has to somehow embrace this perfect imperfection idea.

Last weekend was busy. I had grand plans for both days; on Saturday, we would go out to eat and then drive around and look at lights. The girls would "oooohh" and "aaaahhh" from their little outposts in the backseat, and we would enjoy a light-filled drive home.

*Actually, Baby Sunny Mouse did not find much pleasant about lights at that point of the evening and after commenting positively on one house, spent the remainder of the trip home crying "Out! Out!! Home!".
*Miss Mouse, whom I can usually count on to jump right in along with my plans, declared halfway home that she was far too tired from skating lessons to look at lights and was going to go to sleep "right now". Ah, well. The lights were spectacular.



We woke up to brilliant sunshine on Sunday. The snow sparkled. This day would work well. I could feel it. Despite the subzero temperatures, I was energized by the sunshine and took the pair of Mice on an adventure before church. Miss Mouse begged to drive to the "far away church", across town, to sit by Daddy who was preaching there. I can do that, I figured. As long as we missed the middle church service of the three that morning, I figured we could run to Walmart to pick up our present for the giving tree and still make it to the last service on time.

I mentioned subzero temps, right? Well, where I come from, one dresses for that because you could get stuck on the road somewhere and "this vehicle would get really cold really fast". Somehow even living in town now for 13 years, I haven't lost that drive to bundle up my babies. So, on went the beautiful, fluffy dresses. And then on went the snowpants...over the tights. Then on went the snowboots, the winter jackets, the hats, and the mittens. Into the diaper bag went the dress shoes. Like I said, I started the day with a lot of energy.

And then.....

I realized the vehicle was out of gas. No problem, we can stop at the gas station quickly.....

Except that the pump I chose was frozen.

After several times of pressing the "help" button and receiving none, we drove away to another gas station.

And pulled up to another frozen pump.

At least that time the attendant helped me - by grabbing the gas hose and smacking it around, which apparently did something to jar it out of its freezing-temperature-induced-lethargy because it started to work.

No problem. We only wasted 10 minutes filling the car. We could still make a Walmart trip.

And then.....

I turned the wrong direction off the Interstate. I didn't recognize Walmart sitting directly on the other side of the Interstate in a "classy" beige building rather than the traditional drab-gray-and-blue. This poor decision on my part took us on a residential tour while I attempted to find the retail giant based on street address rather than actually looking around and seeing it under my nose. No problem. We only wasted another 10 minutes. We could still make a quick Walmart trip, grab the towels and sandwich maker I wanted to buy "our 15-18 yr old boy/special needs adult" and arrive at church on time. I'd just have to skip my much-needed-and-happily-anticipated-bathroom-break.

And then......

After surveying the nearly-empty parking lot and congratulating myself on the good thinking of making a Walmart run on Sunday morning.......after getting both girls out of the car into the still-far-below-zero-temperatures......after running up to the front door.....after being confused and wondering if perhaps it was frozen shut........after running while carrying Baby Sunny Mouse/dragging Miss Mouse over to another door......I realized that Walmarts on this side of the river in our metropolis - DO NOT OPEN UNTIL NOON ON SUNDAYS. As a pastor's wife, I should have been pleased about that. I should have been happy that employees there were as free as I was to find a church service and worship.

But I made grunting noises instead and ran/carried/dragged us back to the vehicle.

At least the girls had snowpants. I had open-back shoes and nylons with a short dress. I was able to pull myself together and somewhat gracefully explain to Miss Mouse that even though it was inconvenient for us, it was really nice that this store was closed on Sunday mornings. Believe me, that was explained through gritted teeth.

We did make it to church, however. The girls did get to sit by their Daddy. The girls and I did go skating at the indoor rink near us, as per my 'grand plan' for that day, even though Daddy had to work. And it certainly was a memorable weekend; one I can look back on with thanks that I have the time to attend church with my little girls; that we are able to pick a name from the 'giving tree'; that we had a reliable vehicle that warmed our bodies in ridiculously frigid weather; that I had that entire weekend with my babies and my husband home each night. Within the broken "task lens", the "process lens" shows me a life for which I am profoundly grateful.

Pictures of Miss Mouse's skating adventure are forthcoming as soon as the computer and I get on better terms.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Scripture & A Snapshot

A shoot will come up from the stump of Jesse; from his roots a branch will bear fruit.
Isaiah 11:1

This is the centerpiece we have been enjoying lately. I haven't greatly changed the color; although I did do some editing, for the most part, when candles light the cream colored nativity scene, this is what we gaze upon as we enjoy our evening meals these days.

Miss Mouse has been very excited to see "Little Lord Jesus" on our table. She's been playing nativity scene regularly, and tonight she told me that Baby Jesus was going to sleep next to her all night long (she had tucked in Sunny Baby Mouse's doll, who has been given the role of Baby Jesus, next to her tightly).

I thought about using the more obvious "Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace" verses, mainly because we've been singing them around here a lot these days. Then I remembered this verse and went with it instead, mostly, I think, because I'm desperately trying to keep up to the sermon series being preached here these days, which means I've been spending a lot of my 'workout time' on a stationary bike following Israel and Judah through numerous kings and scandals.


To read that a the stump of Jesse will be renewed, that something good is in the making through all the disobedience and distraction and idol worship going on around 2 Kings (where I'm currently reading), is somehow very encouraging to me as I watch commercial after commercial assuring me that my needs and desires can be fulfilled by simply heading out to the next 24-hour sale at such and such store. Sometimes, perhaps especially this time of year, I think that we are not all that far from the distracted, disobedient, and idolatrous Israelites of centuries past.....we worship different gods, but we worship them devoutly.

*Sigh*.

So we talk about "Little Lord Jesus" as we eat; we sing Christmas carols; we give spare change to the Salvation Army kettles, and attempt to explain to a 3-year-old that it helps feed those who are hungry; we read stories of the shepherds, angels, Baby Jesus, Mary, Joseph, and the wise men regularly; we read about Saint Nicholas, the reasons for his generous spirit, his connection to Santa Claus; and we hope that what we do, how we approach this season, celebrating the culmination of the line of Jesse, will help our two little Mice see through the commercialism of this wonderful, magical season.




Wednesday, December 8, 2010

A Great Fullness

Although I am behind everyone else on the Thanksgiving lists of things for which we are thankful, I have spent a considerable amount of time thinking about that for which I am thankful; in fact, I spend an incredible amount of time doing so. However, with an awesome amount of orders to fill for my crafting business, Thanksgiving projects to work on with Miss Mouse, and an impromptu Thanksgiving meal to prepare*....I haven't gotten around to posting much about what I have been thinking! Anyway, I thought I would use a pictorial method to explain what has been filling up my time, my life, and my heart these days.
---*Mr. T prepared the beautiful (and time consuming) rolled roast for Thanksgiving dinner, stuffed with homemade cornbread stuffing (my contribution), so it wasn't really like I had to prepare a whole turkey or anything! Ahem. Anyway.


I am thankful for my husband, who, though he is a "city boy", wears Red Wing boots, changes the oil on our cars himself, provides meat for us himself - from start to finish, would outlast any Boy Scout in the backwoods, and still manages to cuddle his girls and do some really mean ponytail-fixing.


Not only am I thankful for this cranberry pie, which was made from fresh cranberries and was crustless, sort of like a big, cranberry cookie, but I am thankful for the ability to need a Thanksgiving meal at the last minute and have the resources to provide it for my family. The time, the strength, the finances, all of those things are not to be taken for granted. It seems the older I get, the more experienced I get, perhaps, the more I realize I am just a freak accident or debilitating illness away from not having those resources at my fingertips.


Remaining signs of life under the white, insulating blanket....These remind me and help me remind the girls that spring will come again.

Similarly, I am thankful for the seasons, the ebb and flow of life that we are privilege to view living here. I love the new birth of spring, the heat and growth of summer, the glorious harvest of autumn, and the silence, the stillness, the rest of winter.






Even in the deepest winter cold......

....diapers must be freshened.


Yet I'm very aware that I freshen these diapers, these very fancy, fancy cloth diapers because I want to, because I believe it is better for our environment, because I don't want to fill up the already overflowing, stinky landfill in town anymore than I have to, because I actually like the rhythm diaper-laundering gives to my life.......and because I feel a connection to mothers before me when I hang them out to freshen in the winter or to dry in the summer......


Still.....I'm well aware that the connection I dream of exists on the part of my choice, my privilege and my grandmothers' and great-grandmothers' necessity.

Papa, my Dad's dad, talked sometimes about his wife, my Grandma, whom I never met, freeze-drying diapers in the winter. I like to think she took some pride in the fresh, clean, frozen, sparkling white diapers on her clotheslines; and that makes me feel proud of our cloth-diaper choice, even when it isn't the easiest choice.

The thing is, though, that our choice still comes back to our abundance. Yes, we have saved an amazing amount of money using these diapers as long as we have, but we had to make the investment initially. And that we made because we could. For that, again, every time I wring out a rinsed, soggy, earthy-smelling diaper to go in the washing machine, I am thankful.


It has been easy for me, this fall, to become ungrateful. I miss my husband at mealtimes when he is at work; it breaks my heart to hear Miss Mouse refuse supper, when her Daddy is actually able to take a supper break, saying that maybe if she doesn't eat supper, he won't have to go back to work for the evening. Ungratefulness settles itself in my heart and mind fairly easily from September on here, at least in relation to that topic.

In an effort to help us all deal with hectic schedules, too many meetings, too late work nights, I've decided suppertime is special here. We eat by candelight, with cloth napkins (kind of going again to the try-not-to-fill-up-the-landfill idea, too) and placemats. Even when Mr. T isn't home, the girls and I enjoy the candlelight and, for now, Christmas music. It's hard to feel ungrateful when Bing Crosby is singing in the background and candles are flickering on the table. In my opinion, it has helped us end our day on a thankful note, rather than on a hectic, frustrated, everyone-wants-a-piece-of-mommy note.


Obviously, this isn't the best picture ever. None of the ones that follow will be, but they are important to my point in this post.

I am incredibly thankful for the ability to have taken this picture. On the basic level of the fact that my Mice know both of their grandmas. That's not something I ever experienced, so for that basic privilege, I am very thankful. The relationship I've had with the one Grandma I have known is amazing, lovely. The relationship I have been privileged to have with Mr. T's Grandma Dorothy is also something for which I'm grateful.

This picture was taken at a community Christmas show in our "old hometown", so to speak. My parents, Mr. T, the girls, and I journeyed down there on Saturday night to take in the program. It was wonderful, as we expected. Very few participants are actually trained musicians. There are a few music teachers in the crowd, but for the most part, the soloists, the band members, everyone, are "just" farmers, businesspeople - regular, average people that we know because we lived there and met them on the street.....and they are amazing. Absolutely amazing. Not only is it great that we are able to take in the talent in that area, it is truly awesome that we are welcomed back with open arms.

As we drove into town Saturday night, the Christmas decorations on the streetlights reminded me of how it felt returning there after being home for Christmas (well, the week after - Christmas was always, obviously, spent in town); when we would get home, the decorations which were still up for New Year's, were like a comforting blanket. It always felt like coming home there. I'm not sure that's a feeling many people get twice in a lifetime, but I did, and to some extent, still do. For that, I am grateful.



Yes, indeed, I'm thankful for Grandmas! Not only when they buy Christmas dresses, of course, but it certainly is fun!!! Grandma Kathy has such a great "shopping" eye, finding adorable bargains all over the place! I'm also thankful that we live so close to at least one set of grandparents. Although it is hard to be a difficult day's drive (with children it is difficult, anyway) from my parents, it is so wonderful to be within a couple hours of my in-laws.



The simple things about the holidays.....I'm making an intentional effort to slow our holidays down, to stop any pointless running around as much as possible, to just slow down....because I am convinced that in the slowness is where the most important things take place. Like constructing an entire "tivity set" from random toys, and appointing oneself as "Mary". As a sidenote, an oversized Winnie the Pooh was appointed as Joseph.




I'm not sure what Sunny Baby Mouse is gaining or learning directly from running around with a mixing bowl on her head, but deep within me, something tells me it is much more important than anything a television program or scheduled, regimented "toddler playtime" that we'd break our necks and pocketbooks running to could teach her.



They are watching their bunk beds be constructed. I am intensely grateful for, again, the finances required to provide beds for our family. Mr. T worked with a program at church where beds were provided to those without, and it shocked me to realize how many families, even here, do not have beds on which their little ones can lay their heads. Humbling.



To sandwich all the rest of my thankfulness between the most important beings in my life, I will end with The Mice. Between their Daddy and them, life is full; it is good; it is as complete as it will be here on earth. For them, and for all our incredibly supportive, loving family, I am full of gratitude.

Monday, December 6, 2010

Scripture & A Snapshot

After the hubub of the weekend - craft show, Christmas show, dinner out last night - it should be possible for me to get some blogging done! I stumbled on the Scripture & A Snapshot photo challenge the other day and loved it so much that I'm going to attempt to join....The biggest reason we got our new (refurbished) fancy camera (fancy to us, anyway) was so that we could capture the beauty in our daily lives - whether that is in our children's faces, their hands, their feet, our just in the yard, out on the town, out where my husband loves to hunt - wherever. Sometimes that simple beauty of our everyday lives seems to become far too everyday; we wanted to have the ability to capture that everyday beauty, in large part to remind ourselves that it exists, even in the mundane tasks of life. This photo challenge seemed like a good way to focus on not only the beauty of the world around me but, more importantly, on the "Who" behind that beauty. So, here's my initial entry!

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